The Withers Family

Saturday, March 12, 2011

PHOTO FUNNY: Our First Family Photo

Just wanted to share a quick "photo funny." Here's our attempt to take a family photo with three small, crabby, easily-distracted boys. #FAIL!

I think this is as good as it's going to get! :-)

At Home with Ben

So, what do you need to know about Ben? Well as I said before, he is A-DOR-A-BLE. He's got such a cute face and sweet little mannerisms that always make me smile. He is small, but such a cuddly little guy. He doesn't smile too much on his own, but you can always coax a grin out of him with a tickle or a quick toss in the air. He's very "needy" right now (as can be expected when your whole world gets turned upside down!) He will play on his own for a while, but then he needs to come over, cuddle, and have some one-on-one time with his favorite blankie. After a quick blankie break, he is off and ready to go for a while longer!

He's not a great napper. He sleeps OK at night, but we can't get him to nap for more than about 30-45 minutes during the day. Sometimes I wish he'd take a cue from his brother Eli, who naps for a good 2 hours! He eats better than we thought he would. The checkup reports that we received in the months before he came home always noted "poor oral intake." We weren't exactly sure what that meant, but he's tried everything we've offered to him and has eaten some really great meals. My only complaint in the food department is that he eats incredibly s-l-o-w-l-y. Sometimes I feel as if I've spent my whole day at the table with him. Nonetheless, I think we'll fatten him up in no time!

Ben is a thumb-sucker. I've never had one of those before. He only sucks his thumb when he has his blankie. It's really stinking adorable to see, but it does make me anxious about how we will break him of it in the future.

What are some of my favorite things about Ben? He makes funny faces at me. He turns his head up, squints his eyes, squishes up his nose and grins at me sometimes and it just makes me giggle. I'm trying to get a picture of it. When he finishes taking a drink, he smacks his lips and says, "Ahhhhh!" I also love that he plays peek-a-boo, without any prompting. Sometimes when he has his blankie, he'll just hold it up over his face, then peek out with a big grin.

My all-time favorite thing about Ben? It's the same with all my boys. It's that sweet, heavy feeling of a head on my shoulder and a body on my chest and a face nuzzled into my neck. Even when everyone is screaming to be held at the same time and life is completely nuts and I wonder how in the world I'm going to survive the next few minutes, let alone the next few years, that precious snuggly feeling is one I never take for granted.

A few pictures of Ben at home with us . . . . .

So sweet, so tired, so confused . . . first night home

Checking "little" brother Eli out

Love his sweet face!

Floor time with Daddy

I just love Eli's face in this one

Hanging out with Daddy . . . . drool and all.

Smiley Eli loves the new red truck Ben brought home

Momma and Ben first thing in the morning

Could he be any cuter???

Friday, March 11, 2011

Life with Ben

He's here! He's here! He's here!

It's no surprise, but again I've not kept up with my blogging as I would like to. A lot has happen in the last three weeks, namely

BEN IS HOME!!!!

It's been two weeks ago tonight since we welcomed our new little man home. He is doing SO well. He's eating and sleeping well. And yes, he is adorable. He is just a tiny little peanut. So small for his age! He and Eli are just three days apart in age (and Ben is older) but Eli looks like a giant when they stand next to each other. All his medical tests came back OK, so no worries there. It's hard to explain, but he feels much more like a "baby" than Eli does. In my mind, Eli is officially a toddler. Ben's just not quite there yet.

The last two weeks certainly haven't been without their challenges. While Ben has slept and eaten well, he does have some problems getting along with his brothers. When things don't go his way or he has trouble sharing, he bites! Poor Eli has gotten the brunt of Ben's chompers over the last week. We're working with them to keep the peace. I'm sure it will get better, but right now it just stinks!

I've got much much more to share, but I'd better wrap up this post with a few pics from Ben's homecoming day. Will try to post more over the weekend!

Here he is! Ben and his escort

Meeting Ben

Ben has a "lovey" - his special blanket. Thank goodness for it! I'm so thankful that he has something that can give him such comfort.

Daddy and Ben

Momma and Ben (yes, I am a crier!)

Eli does not like to share his momma!

The Withers Family of FIVE!!!

Our family with Ben's escort

Chatting with the escort, getting ready to head home

The official group photo of Ben's welcoming committee. So thankful to have so many family and friends there to share this special occasion!

Me and my sweet, tired boy

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Waiting on Ben . . .

Everybody's asking, everybody's wondering . . . . . . . where is Ben??? Here's the scoop. We thought he would be home before the end of 2010. We submitted our paperwork in August and expected to meet Ben in November or December (obviously that didn't happen!). We were thrown a big curve-ball in August when the Korean ministry which processes the paperwork basically shut down unexpectedly for the year. It is so frustrating to wait when you don't know how long the wait will be - and there is absolutely NOTHING you can do to make it any shorter. Sometimes bureaucracy really stinks!

The extra months added to our wait have been both a blessing and a curse. A blessing in that it has given us extra time we didn't expect to be a family of 4 with Noah and Eli. It was nice to enjoy a quiet Christmas at home with our two boys - something we'll be able to look back on in years to come and say, "Here's the Christmas when we were waiting on Ben." It's given me more time to get used to the idea of being a mom to three boys under 3 years of age. I'm still scared to death, but faith in God and the love of my husband and family have gotten me this far, so I guess we'll just stick with it!

This extra time hasn't been easy, of course. I'll admit that it was incredibly difficult not to have Ben home for his first birthday. My heart aches when I think of the parts, the milestones, of Ben's life that we've missed. That ache is especially sharp when I compare Eli's life to Ben's. I know, I know, comparing two different little boys is probably a bad habit that I should break, but I think it's natural to look at Eli (who is only THREE DAYS younger than Ben) and wonder, "What's Ben doing today? Can he walk yet? Does he like bananas as much as Eli? Does he make silly faces like Eli does? Is he EVER going to come home so these three brothers can play together?"

My days are busy of course - Noah and Eli make sure of that! I just get this feeling of stalling out, no forward motion, no progress being made. It's hard to stay positive. It feels like the wait is going to drag on forever and we're just going to be stuck in this sad cycle of waiting. It's hard to find the motivation to do anything - like housework, long-awaited projects, or blogging. I won't allow the wait to ruin the time we have now or prevent us from living our lives "in the now" though. I take such joy in Noah and Eli and the way they grow and learn and oh my goodness do they make me laugh! Our days are happy, but there's always a shadow. So many thoughts, so many questions, so many depressed, dark times, waiting. Just waiting on Ben . . . .

There is hope! The beginning of 2011 has brought good news. The Korean ministry has reopened and begun processing paperwork, and ours is already approved! We're running out of steps left in this crazy process, so we expect Ben to be home SOON! Hopefully in just a few weeks. Nathan's birthday is February 18th . . . . . maybe Ben will be the best birthday present ever!